People I Want to Slap in the Face

'Happy little theme for this Friday, isn't it? There are just certain people, whom I don't know and have never met, whose public personas just get to me. So here are a few people that need to be slapped:

  Esther from Amish Mafia-
Ooh, I want to hit her so bad! If you've never seen the show, congratulations. You're brain cells have not been forced to commit suicide in a desperate attempt to not have to process what your eyes and ears are consuming. The premise of the show is there is a group of Amish/Mennonite people in Lancaster, Pennsylvania that enforce rules when the church and community can't or won't. I just don't buy it. For people supposedly living a simplistic life to please God, they sure have a buggy-load of issues. (See what I did there? Instead of boat-load, I said buggy-load.)
Esther, the only female "character" on this "reality" show seems to be the root of mostly everyone's problems. She sings the praises of these "badass" guys and stirs up trouble when there doesn't seem to be any. I think she works out her mouth more than she works the fields, so I'm pretty sure I could take her. Esther, you deserve a slap in the face.

        Taylor Swift-
 Oh, I know... Everyone picks on poor little Taylor Swift :( And all the boys chase her with around the playground with frogs and pull her piggytails :( I really do think she is a talented songwriter, but I'm getting sick of songs about tainted love and shouldbe fairy tails. Love is just plain hard sometimes, sweetpea. So with every new song about heartbreak, Taylor Swift, I want to slap you in the face. And stop wearing too bright lipstick and grandma clothes.


   
Restaurant Chains who Sell Bad Coffee- I know you have taste testers and perform market research before introducing new products, Restaurant Chains, so what's up with the crappy coffee? Do you pick three pack a day smokers and people with ageusia and/or anosmia for your panels? Those are people can't smell or taste, in case you didn't want to crack out your medical dictionaries. Some of us coffee addicts can drink hotel room or gas station coffee and be okay with it as long as it resembles a dark brown liquid and provides our caffeine. But there are some places with coffee so atrocious it is pretty much undrinkable. Burger King, for example, you deserve one giant slap in the face.

Well, I do believe I have spread enough merriment and angst for the morning, so I will take some deep cleansing breathes and move on with my day. I hope yours is wonderful!